You have this body. A pre-assigned meat suit you were born with, that hurts when you bash it and feels good when you rest it and lets you taste cheesesteak and spot red balloons in that blue, blue sky. You can dance with it. You can run with it. Its finely tuned responses and firing [...]
All my life, I’ve thought there was someone out there for me. I wondered what he looked like, how he laughed, what his eyebrows did when he was annoyed. How kind he was, what his jokes would be. What we would do on Sunday mornings, what our traditions would become. Waffles and sunshine. Watching TV [...]
My ex had a lot of money. The year before we split up, he became an official millionaire. This was a more low-key moment than you might imagine. He looked up from his laptop and said “I have a million dollars in the bank now.” I looked up from my laptop and replied “Huh. Cool.” [...]
Does this look like the kind of woman who would ask her daughter to write her obituary as a birthday present? NOT REALLY, NO. That cheerful smile hides a rather gothic sensibility. She looks like she’d ask for a nice book, doesn’t she? Maybe a Rosamunde Pilcher novel or something by the Dalai Lama. But, [...]
I’m done being okay with dating people who don’t really want to be with me. I’m done being okay with saying “Yes, I’ll have your kid even though you don’t want to marry me.” I’m done being okay when someone takes three years to say they love me. I’m just done being okay with the bullshit. To [...]
I’m back on my meditation kick. It tends to sound a little suspect, especially if you’re not from California, but meditation is just the hemp-wearing cousin of your standard Baptist-approved prayer: quiet your brain and connect with something larger than yourself. It all comes from the same place, really – the basic human desire to live a [...]
I want you to think I’m great. I do. I admit it. Yes, you. You sitting there in your chair or on the bus or wherever you happen to be reading this right now. Also my friends, my family, people I date, people I meet at parties and will never see again, people I sleep [...]
Skydiving. Public speaking. Bungee Jumping. Talking to men in elevators instead of staring intently at my phone. (Because a text message from two days ago is so much more enthralling than your perfect profile, Hot Guy.) I’m also kind of freaked out by raccoons, but raccoons don’t end up on many life lists, so I [...]
My friends Leah and Simon are getting married in a few weeks. I officiated their legal marriage a few months ago, the one for the health insurance. Diamond rings and fancy parties are all well and good, but the real romance is in staring down half an inch of paperwork for the goddamn Blue Cross. [...]
“We’re the sponges of the world.” Someone said this to me a few years ago, and the idea crawled into my cerebellum and made a nice home there. I suspect the idea even went to Ikea and got some brightly colored cushions and cheap furniture it couldn’t figure out how to put together. So it [...]
