Chips Please, Hold the Sandwich
Posted by Moose on December 9th, 2009. Filed under: My brain needs a drink.I like managing my own schedule, right up until the moment I realize that managing my own schedule really means procrastinating until the last possible second and then using promises of a trip to Walgreens for Tuscan Cheese Kettle chips and triple chocolate Ben and Jerry’s to propel me toward tomorrow’s deadline. I look at the masses of work between now and then and contemplate joining the circus. I’m deterred only by the knowledge that fleeing to the Big Top wouldn’t entail spangled outfits and death-defying feats of acrobatics but rather picking up after an incontinent elephant named Walter.
This admission of my poor planning is not meant as a complaint, because it’s WORK! I LOVE WORK! SO DOES MY LANDLADY! I just wish I didn’t use my lack of discipline as an excuse to compound said lack of discipline with delicious trans-fats. Oh, who am I kidding? I love any excuse to eat chips. Especially after an evening of Farmer Brown’s fried chicken with a dear college friend before flammable drinks at Bourbon and Branch. Even if I used said hedonism as an excuse to sleep until 10 a.m. this morning. I sense your sympathy for my plight is waning.
I’m convinced I was born Catholic and my parents neglected to tell me, such is my capacity for guilt. So what if I procrastinated? It will still get done. I know this because I have yet to miss a deadline, even if I had to spend the wee hours of the morning chugging Pepsi to maintain my flawless record. Thrashing myself senseless over how it’s getting done is pointless exercise, and my bicep o’ self-flagellation is the one muscle on my body that doesn’t need any exercise. So I’m going to get some chips before returning to work. It will be a nice opportunity to put on pants for the first time today.
December 9th, 2009 at 7:07 pm
The only time I’ve changed out of my pajamas in THREE days was to attend said B&B shindig. So there, you’re not, in fact, alone =) Not that that’s really at all related to your post about procrastination, but not changing out of my pajamas has been a tool in procrastinating the working out I’ve been putting off for, oh, a month now. Blaming it on the weather only goes so far.
December 9th, 2009 at 7:16 pm
I say that too! If someone was judging on how much I drink and how much I guilt myself, they’d swear I was Catholic.
December 9th, 2009 at 9:29 pm
So I had a few cocktails at Bourbon and Branch earlier this year and holy moses, FLAMMABLE is the best way to describe them! That’s what I remember most and I don’t remember much, actually. Not even what the secret password was. As for procrastination — I hate that I do it, but man it is SO MOTIVATING when you put something off…I have yet to figure out an answer to the question of how does one stop…
December 9th, 2009 at 10:04 pm
What up, Revolver? Best. drink. ever.
I must say, I’ll be thinking about your freelancinc freedom tomorrow while sitting in my padded cubicle. It is one of the awesome perks of freelancing. Enjoy it! Watch bad TV all afternoon after you meet your deadline for me!
December 10th, 2009 at 12:33 pm
You know, I think I’ve been in England too long. I was totally picturing steak fries.
December 14th, 2009 at 2:15 pm
gawd, I’ve been there. I’ve been home, sick, eating lots of cranberry orange sweet bread because I am feeling sorry for myself (and because I made two huge loaves).
December 14th, 2009 at 5:59 pm
I work from home, too. I have for seven years now. It took me about five and a half years to stop feeling guilty for sleeping later than most, spending all day in my pjs, sometimes gorging on sweets for breakfast and lunch, working into the wee hours when I have to, and staying out late and taking breaks (or time off) whenever I freaking feel like it. I created this little life of mine. I’ve found my own rhythm and I revel in it.
Now where’d I hide those chocolate covered thingamajigs…