Concrete Shoes, However, Are Not a Good Idea. Take It From Guido.
Posted by Moose on September 22nd, 2008. Filed under: How To.Concrete action is a universal panacea. Is “universal panacea” redundant? You know what would be a good concrete action right now? PICKING UP A DICTIONARY TO FIND OUT. Sometimes, concrete action should be shuffled aside for the sake of expediency. See how quickly I disprove my own points? I’m ridiculously bad at arguing for just this reason. Also, because I’m always convinced your point is more valid than mine, even if your point proclaims the world is flat and winged pigs soar gracefully above the fir trees growing abundantly on that flat plane. One of my good friends in college was a national debate champion and I never once got in an argument with her. If a normal person can mop the floor with me in a spat, can you imagine what a champion would do? My dignity would have boarded a bus to New Jersey and never returned.
Moose-Approved Concrete Actions:
1. Every time you get concerned about the state of the world, send money to the Obama campaign. (I personally do this only every third time I get concerned about the state of the world. I’m not Bill Gates, yo. Unfortunately, the Obama website does not yet have a coin slot where I can insert the three nickels and a dime I found at the bottom of my purse.)
2. When you open your mailbox in a state of high anticipation – even though you’ve ordered nothing from Amazon and have no reason to believe anyone has written you but the water company or your Great Aunt Mildred who wants her casserole dish back, you thieving heathen – and that high anticipation yields absolutely nothing, not even one of those aggravating menus from Hu Nan Wu Nan, send someone in your address book a little gift. I recommend salt caramels.
3. Fool yourself. I am a prime, annoying example of those people who say they want to be healthy while choosing a chocolate donut to augment that vanilla latte. So now I say to myself: What would a healthy person do? And I try to fool my brain into thinking I’m a healthy person. Luckily, my brain is easily fooled and so I pick up a carrot.
All this registers in the crimson zone on the Captain Obvious-ometer, but it’s taken me a remarkably long time to adhere to the concrete action credo. I’m someone who can think about something for years, entire calendar years, before doing anything about it. It drives people batty, and rightfully so. I’m sure you’re all much better at getting things done, and have checked the box marked ”supremely impressive accomplishments” off your lists. If you have any concrete action credos, please share. Right there in the comment box. INSPIRE ME, PEOPLE.
(Um, can you tell I didn’t do a single productive thing this weekend? Except drink sparkling white wine, stare at glass exhibits a la Alice in Wonderland on acid, and snuggle with a pint-size chihuahua? You can? YOU SMART BEAST, YOU.)
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September 22nd, 2008 at 9:09 am
I can make your inbox exciting! Send me your address because just last night I picked up a Texas-y treat for you!
And, I’m voting redundant.
September 22nd, 2008 at 9:30 am
I’ll just be hanging out here looking for inspiration myself since I am the EXACT SAME WAY. I drive my own self crazy. My only comfort is that I’m not as bad as my mother, from whom I inherited this lovely character trait. Not only does she not take concrete action, she talks about what she is going to do all the time (i.e., starting on Friday night to talk about how she is going to wash the dog this weekend. Refraining from leaving the house on Saturday because she is going to wash the dog. Going to bed Sunday night without having washed the dog.).
September 22nd, 2008 at 9:34 am
You and I must be on a similar page – I was just writing about the minutes I have left….to “do” anything! Cheers to you for even contemplating action and thanks for the link to the exhibit.
September 22nd, 2008 at 9:38 am
Was the Chihuly exhibit cool? I am trying to decide if I want to go before it closes and I can’t decide. Must take concrete action! Help!
September 22nd, 2008 at 9:44 am
I am one of those people that has everything written into their calendar… and then only just manages to get it all done. I say, set yourself deadlines! Not mean-spirited ones, but helpful ones. For instance, mine was “Friday, finish drawing homework. Saturday, finish drawing homework + do Costume Design homework. Sunday, hang out with boyfriend + study for History test.” Gotta get a reward in there… but not rewards all the time. So if the goals are in a general time period, you can feel justified spreading out the work over the course of a day.
Or, just read every self-help article Gala Darling has ever written.
September 22nd, 2008 at 11:57 am
OOOOHHHHH. I LOVE that one about Obama. I do that too and now my fiance is going door-to-door in Nevada to talk to swing state voters.
Nevada, you’ve been warned. And yes, he’s taken.
Also that clever beast is the president of Chihuahuas for Obama. Just ask him.
September 22nd, 2008 at 12:38 pm
my concrete action credo generally involves this quote by rabbi hillel which hangs over my bed (inherited when my grandfather passed away): “if i am not for myself, who will be for me? if i am not for others, what am i? if not now, when?” when i read this i feel like i must act. this is not at all easy for me, as i am by nature a body at rest and not a body in motion. but i think of my grandfather and all he did, then i remind myself to just stop thinking at all and do it, whatever it is, big or small. i took a first step this weekend by doing what was mentioned above, going door to door for the obama campaign. it was terrifying, but i did it. i might even do it again.
your actions listed above all seem like perfect ways to stay in motion. i really know how hard it is. it takes me years to act too. small steps.
September 22nd, 2008 at 12:58 pm
I ordered the 30 Day Shred and plan on actually DOING it. Unless it kills me, of course.
September 22nd, 2008 at 1:50 pm
I have a tendency to occasionally ask myself what a sane and/or mature person would say whilst drafting emails to exes or others for whom there is a potentially high degree of emotional conflict. It is only occasionally successful at reigning me in.
September 22nd, 2008 at 2:39 pm
As far as concrete action goes, I always repeat to myself what my great-grandmother (and, like, the rest of the world) always said: This too shall pass. In other words, it might suck, but it’ll be over if you get it done. It’s kind of a circular persuasion. (I don’t want to do it, it sucks! But once I do it, it won’t suck! But doing it sucks! But once it’s done… !)
It works, for all that. I am a serious, hardcore procrastinator. I have lost friends and job opportunities because of it. The older I get, the more important and true that little saying becomes. This too shall pass… if I get off my ass and take care of it.
Really, it’s more helpful than it sounds.
September 22nd, 2008 at 4:34 pm
oh, man. this is such a tough issue.
i’m a lover of lists and will often have a nice long one–and then get nothing done.
but i do have spurts of productivity. they’re just not as often as they could/should be.
so thanks for the inspiration. i’ll put it on my list.
September 23rd, 2008 at 8:49 am
…and i recommend sending those salt caramels to me
September 23rd, 2008 at 10:14 am
Lately, my credo has been an admonishment of “Don’t be like Terry.”
Terry is my father and my anti-role model. Whenever I am feeling critical or negative or the least bit pessismistic, whether toward myself or about others, I try to remember to simply do the opposite of what he would do.
September 24th, 2008 at 9:29 am
I will send you something! I love sending surprises!
September 24th, 2008 at 11:24 am
I generally think about doing things (bigger things) for a long time, but don’t really tell anyone about them and so it looks like I just suddenly spring into action.
Unless, of course, you actually come over to my apartment in which case you will discover 3 month old paint swatches still up on the wall. Ahem.
September 25th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
Oh, I really love the idea in #2!
September 25th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
Ooo, I love Captain Obvious. He gives the best advice, like ever.
And you’re the 3rd person this week to mention salted caramels…I may need to jump on that bandwagon. Might as well–I’ve already been sucked into the whole “Twilight” book series, dammit.
September 29th, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Credo #17: Don’t kill spiders. As a painter I have killed hundreds and perhaps thousands of these delicate little creatures that, while i admit make many a person squeal, serve the beautiful function of being food for hungry preying mantis and proving the manhood of many an accomodating boy. At some point -I think it was after eating a bag of psilocybin mushrooms- I realized that I could save the life of even the smallest creature with some very simple measures. I’ve become obsessive about it and actually go out of my way to do so, even letting them hang from the brim of my hat while calmly putting down the brush and bucket, wiping at the invisible web hanging from their butt and placing them safely in a bush. And you know, I’ve yet to be bitten or had one crawl across my face while sleeping.
Other people I know that DO kill spiders however.. many problems. they KNOW dog!~
October 2nd, 2008 at 6:35 am
This past year I have learned the best thing I can reach for is a peaceful heart… if I can achieve that I think ease with the ups and downs will follow.
Or cheese. Cheese and milk stouts.