Slackers Guide to BlogHer
Posted by Moose on July 23rd, 2008. Filed under: How To.My tiny apartment didn’t understand the meaning of cramped until we tried to stuff in two people, rather than just one person and lots of neuroses. (Hey, neuroses take up space.) I invited Jenni to stay with me for BlogHer back when I was living in a house boasting guest quarters – complete with private bathroom and live-in butler. Then I moved out and “guest quarters” became “kitchen floor, but only if you tilt the stove five inches to the right so the air mattress fits.” Our correspondence on the matter went something like this:
Dear Jenni,
Hope you don’t mind sleeping with your head in the oven!
Love,
Moose
She didn’t, of course, but I still felt bad. Especially when I took her and her vegan diet to an Irish pub and fed her large sausages. “What? That’s not meat! Ha ha! No! Those are filled with carrots! Brown, tasty carrots!” I win the prize for Best Host Ever. Anyone want to come visit? (Hey, where are you going? Don’t back away. I CAN STILL SEE YOU.)
(Picture snagged from Kerrianne.)
Know the secret of BlogHer? Sleep all day so you can wear a McDonald’s bag on your head all night. Where “all night” equals “until AT LEAST 12:30 a.m., because you’re crazy like that.” I didn’t learn much, what with all that sleeping, but I was sprightly and well-rested for getting kicked out of the CheeseburgHer party (for unseemly bag wearing, I assume). Then the party was kicked out of the hallway (for unseemly noise) and later kicked out of the lobby for unseemly, um, sitting. Because people need to get to the elevators, you lazy carpet-sitting bloggers, you. (I can still see his face glaring down at us as we sat with glazed expressions in a pile of cheeseburger wrappers. Maybe we should have offered him some fries.)
I wasn’t as participatory as I’d like to be next year (see: sleeping all day), but I did come away with the strong sense that 1) people are lovely (especially when they let you drag them on the Food Is Terribly Important tour of Hayes Valley – stops include Miette and Blue Bottle Coffee) and 2) blogging is something I love doing.
If I wasn’t a slacker, I’d end this post with something inspiring. But I am, so I’ll trust you to inspire yourselves. You’re an inspiring bunch.
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July 23rd, 2008 at 10:48 am
Still mad about not going to Miette!
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:00 am
OK, let’s hold each other accountable: Next year, I’ll go, too, come Hell or high water, and we’ll both be dedicated bloggers and actually attend something other than a cocktail party. Deal?
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:11 am
Next time I come to San Francisco, I’d like to try these sausages you speak of.
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:15 am
Hey, it was nice to meet you. Wasn’t it fun?
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:19 am
Mmmmmm I want a salty caramel. NOW.
I should have bought more. Silly me. Except I’m pretty sure if I had, the woman behind us in line would have stabbed me.
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:35 am
Ha ha! You and Jenni look more fashionably chic than Lucy and Ethel in the potato sack dresses and the horse feed bag hat.
I once tried to feed a vegan friend chicken cannelloni from the Olive Garden because it was, as I had told her, a “light meat.” Too bad there was veal in it, too. Oops.
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:37 am
next year i will force you
(and Kristin)
July 23rd, 2008 at 12:35 pm
Our trip to Miette has inspired me to make a t-shirt that reads “I love you in spite of your affinity for black licorice.”
It will be black, of course.
(Also: I MISS you. Come to Portland! We have a comfy futon, and an amazing cupcake shop within walking distance!)
July 23rd, 2008 at 9:50 pm
Oooohhh, I bet your hair smelled like tasty, tasty fries!
July 24th, 2008 at 10:33 pm
Those cheeseburgers were simultaneously the best and worst thing I ate on my entire trip…
July 28th, 2008 at 11:25 pm
Nice hat. Really.