Jeeves!
Posted by Moose on October 4th, 2007. Filed under: Daily, Friends.Where can I apply for a Jeeves? (Of Jeeves and Wooster, of course.) Surely there’s some government program that sends needy people a butler.
Out-of-town guests will be arriving at the Oakland airport in five hours and I can’t manage to get out of bed. Something is pressing on my chest and even careful application of tea and fear (do you WANT your friends to know how filthy the backseat of your car is?) hasn’t lifted it. I don’t think it’s the flu, it just feels like exhaustion. Or possibly keyed up social anxiety – the kind that comes with egg-encrusted plates littering the sink and no clean towels and the looming arrival of house guests who will have to entertain themselves because I’m too busy watching my limbs twitch and begging someone, anyone (JEEVES!), to fetch me an advil. And some eggs benedict.
I’m certain that Jeeves, were he here, would sail into the kitchen to fix me a restorative elixir and encourage me to sleep it off. I would wake, refreshed and ready for ill-conceived hijinks (from which Jeeves would rescue me), to find a clean house, a happy dog, and that my dirty white Suzuki Esteem had been traded in for a Mini Cooper. Jeeves knows that I prefer red.
October 4th, 2007 at 11:48 am
A hangover, perhaps? Or am I just presuming?
October 8th, 2007 at 5:26 am
When you find the magic formula to call a butler, please let me know, because housekeeping and I will never be friends. And I’d love to knock my husband dead with glee at the cleaned, butler-ified house we suddenly would own.
October 9th, 2007 at 11:01 am
I need me one of those too… Coming home from a long weekend to a dirty kitchen, piles of laundry, and work the next day is just not cutting it.