Meant to Be a Warm and Witty Exposition on Love, Until I Got Sidetracked By Cynicism
Posted by Moose on January 19th, 2007. Filed under: Love.I’m highly suspicious of love at first sight. It’s not that I don’t believe in it. I do. I’ve read romance novels and I know they tell only the pure, unmitigated truth about everything from immediate lasting affection to the probability of a heroine retaining her bouncy, shiny curls while lost in an Amazon rainforest for six months. I’ve even experienced love at first sight – more than once. And that’s not counting Mike, my seventh grade love. Hi, Mike! I had a huge crush on you! But, then, you probably knew that. I’m not very subtle.
Love at first sight: yes. Mentioning it anywhere near that first glowing glimpse: no. People who say, “I love you” on Wednesday of week one scare me. Not that you can’t feel it, or mean it with all your sentimental/horny little heart, but I like to keep a functional escape clause. You can always escape, even after the three words, you just have to listen to wails of “I thought you luuurved me!” as you race out the back door clutching your shoes and maybe a piece of toast for the road. Not that I’ve ever done this. See: Escape Clause, Functional. Nor has anyone done this to me. If anyone ever mentioned love to me while our relationship could still be measured in weeks, or even months, I would smile politely and dial 911 under the table.
I feel strongly that you should experience bad habits before making any pronouncements. Bad habits take time to ferret out. Anyone can be on good behavior for a few months, even a year or so. (Well, anyone but me. I last approximately three days.) And not just the cute bad habits like weighing yourself with shoes on, taking the shoes off, weighing the shoes, and doing the math. I’m talking bad habits like shrieking in grocery store parking lots or storing spare body parts in the freezer. You’d best be sure you can live with such things before making any grand pronouncements you’ll have to retract after you find that left leg behind the ice cream.
My tender underbelly, the one that identifies with romance and plucky heroines with bouncy hair (not the one that wants to cure the world’s ills with cheese, though I can see how you might make that mistake), is cringing. The rest of me applauds my thoughtful cynicism and heckles tender romance (though never bouncy hair).
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January 19th, 2007 at 5:27 pm
A number of times… for a number of years… I didn’t realize how much I cared for someone until they were gone…
“you don’t miss the water, ’til the well runs dry”
Never said “those words”… wanted to… but then it was too late.
I guess the next logical step would be to stalk, or move on.
Both have their pluses…
Then again, you can say “Love you” right out of the gate…
but that’s creepy…
rr
January 20th, 2007 at 2:08 am
[...] What I didn’t say (see: finishing thoughts, trouble with) is that I do believe in love at first sight. (Well, I did say that. I’m taking the thought to its conclusion. This is rare. Appreciate it.) And I do believe it can last for years, even to the much-touted til’ death, etc. [...]