Clear On Where My Priorities Lie

Posted by Moose on October 31st, 2006. Filed under: Holidays.

Number of M&Ms consumed: 9,641

Number of peanut M&Ms consumed: 3,611

Number of costumes originally conceived and lovingly crafted: 0

Number of decisions made about whether to sit at the top of the stairs (force the greedy little bastards to work for their candy) or the bottom (will totally cave and come down the stairs for children in strollers so may as well save myself the effort): 1

Number of bags of candy purchased: 6

Number of eggs stockpiled for use on teenagers who have no business trick-or-treating and even less business trick-or-treating without costumes while claiming they need extra candy for “my sick little brother” (sick little brother, my ass): 8

Happy Halloween!

7 Responses to Clear On Where My Priorities Lie

  1. squid

    and im at work, 7pm to 7am…. i wanted to chase girls in tight cat outfits around the bar too!

  2. a Random Person

    The suspense is killing me: did you sit at the top of the stairs? or the bottom?

  3. mp

    Did you get to use the eggs??

  4. Jenn

    The trick to stockpiling eggs for hucking at teenagers is that you have to start in July, and keep them someplace warm.

  5. Moose

    Hi, my name is Moose and I’m a fraud. I didn’t actually throw any eggs. Nor did I decide whether to sit at the top or bottom of the stairs. Instead, I migrated. Constantly, for two hours. The dog got very confused.

  6. a Random Person

    … I can never trust again.

  7. meredith

    I find it hard to believe you gave candy away (willingly).

    Me? I don’t even play. I buy the candy for me and then sit in the dark cramming it all in my mouth.

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