This Design Brought to You By Paris Hilton and Manolo Blahnik
Posted by Moose on July 21st, 2006. Filed under: Uncategorized.Behold my beautiful new web site. I had nothing to do with it. Schnozz designed and implemented and tore out large chunks of hair while I sat at my computer eating bonbons and yelling “More shoes!” “Smaller font!” and “Stop giving me lip, woman!”
She should know better than to do nice things for me.
Like how my picture is splashed all over the masthead? Not one, not two, but three pictures of me. One that says “I am charming, I am sweet.” Another says, “Here is my profile. Worship me.” A third that says, “I want to eat your head.” If I can’t inherit hotels, this is the next best thing.
Please note the holy grail of shoes given prominent placement on the masthead. This is the shoe I would fondle inappropriately if the salesgirls at Neiman Marcus would let my grubby paws anywhere near it. When discussing the design, Schnozz asked if I liked shoes. Do I like shoes? Dude. I devote entire sections of entire days to looking at shoes. My first word was “shoes.” My shoes outnumber the population of Rhode Island. Bring on the shoes!
Not being the brightest bulb on the shelf, I required an explanation for the leaning left thing. Traditionally, the devil whispers in your left ear. These days, however, the devil is in your ipod. Be careful. My personal devil doesn’t need a trendy mp3 player to to nudge me left. As you can see from the masthead, I’m quite corruptible. She doesn’t even need a post-it note. All she needs is a pair of $500 shoes to place in my general vicinity and I’m lost. Given the exponential increase in my cookie consumption after a large cookie was placed on my last masthead, this doesn’t bode well for my credit card bill.
There are still a few bugs on the site. Not everything has been imported, previous comments are floating in the ether, my feed doesn’t seem to work, I can’t redirect people to this blog because my old blog is stuck. But I have categories now. And a commenting system that doesn’t drive you to gently knock your head against the nearest available hard surface.
I am happy. Schnozz is bald.
July 21st, 2006 at 12:52 am
Dude, this design kicks booty! I love it! Well done!
July 21st, 2006 at 1:18 am
Looking good! Moose.
I am so happy to have found someone who love heels as much as I do. I usually don’t let anyone look in my closet for fear of judgment. And loud gasps. The shoes, they have taken over. ; )
July 21st, 2006 at 3:20 am
Hello! Welcome to the half-baked site we were forced to unveil early because Blogger is melting!
The feed doesn’t work. There are no comments. The import is not complete (which is good, Moose, because you have GOT to stop categorizing posts that aren’t even going to exist later, when the commented posts show up). Yet people are visiting. This is worse than walking into your surprise party in your bathrobe with curlers in your hair. THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING.
I am never going to get over this, Moose. Ever. Mark my words. No amount of cookies will ever undo the pain.
Though you’re welcome to try. Hmm …
July 21st, 2006 at 7:45 am
Moose – love the page. Schnozz – Good job!
July 21st, 2006 at 7:57 am
Thanks, guys! I wish I could claim credit for any of this. Sadly, my design skills begin and end with shouting “That shoe needs to be redder!” while Schnozz does all the work.
Kerri: I did choose the shoe. Doesn’t it make you want to snatch your credit cards and race to the nearest store?
July 21st, 2006 at 8:04 am
sweeeeeett looks cool! i like it
July 21st, 2006 at 9:22 am
That masthead makes me happy. Shoes make me happy. This blog makes me happy. I’m so glad I clicked on Schnozz’s link.
Sigh.
July 21st, 2006 at 12:12 pm
YAY! pretty new floors to scuff up and mark with your genious and pretty red shoes!
July 21st, 2006 at 2:17 pm
Despite stumbing along in the dark I managed to find my way to your new home.
very slick
July 21st, 2006 at 5:28 pm
Moose, it’s hilarious that you made that comment about the shoe needing to be redder. I just looked at it and was like “Hmm. That shoe needs to be redder.” So I made it redder. Then read your comment.
July 21st, 2006 at 7:10 pm
Lovely, lovely new site! And beautiful red shoes. Nice job, Schnozz! Love the doors on the sidebar, too.
July 22nd, 2006 at 9:43 am
Love the new digs! (Shnozz, you are a great designer.) I’m with Sam: this is a happy, happy place.