I Refrained from Listing Number Three as “Dead Body”
Posted by Moose on May 24th, 2006. Filed under: Random Lists.I’ve always wondered what “meme” meant. Is it like “me! me! me!” – my common childhood chant? (Some might argue that it remains my chant to this day. I pay no attention to such people.) Or does the word contain more subtlety and nuance, best when pronounced with a Yugoslavian accent? It’s certainly the internet equivalent of chasing each other on the playground while contemplating the existential dilemma of Barbie versus He-Man. I prefer the adult version, where everyone is sitting down in different rooms and snacking on Cheetos.
I think “meme” really means “Thank god. Now I don’t have to actually think up something to write today.” Thanks, Cath. My tender, overexerted brain bows to you in relief. Right after draining out my ears and onto the carpet. So here I go, onward to victory with my first meme.
5 items in my fridge
1. Homemade salad dressing – I didn’t make it
2. Leftover pork chops – Didn’t make those either
3. Half a glacier’s worth of ice, just waiting to jump from the freezer onto my bare feet
4. A block of cheddar with 78 percent of its surface bedecked in mold
5. Hershey’s chocolate sauce purchased during the Clinton administration
5 items in my closet
1. Approximately 93 pairs of shoes. I don’t know how they got there. Really.
2. Approximately 18 handbags. Also not sure how they got there. The aliens must be having, um, a garage sale. In my closet. My goodness, but they do have excellent taste in handbags.
3. Stuffed moose
4. Precariously wobbling white bureau that is not allowed to be in view of the household and its impeccable furniture aesthetic
5. Duffel bag large enough to store Jimmy Hoffa
5 items in my car
1. Vast quantities of dog hair
2. Adult-size green glitter fairy wings
3. A towel, covered in dirt and dog hair
4. Mardi gras beads from my last birthday
5. Did I mention the dog hair?
5 items in my purse
1. Yellow highlighter
2. Four pens
3. Two notebooks
4. Bank statement
5. Official badge proclaiming “I am a Geek. Officially.” Yes, it’s laminated.
5 people who are tagged*
1. Kaleidoscopic Eclat
2. Christine
3. Whyioughtta
* Cleverly mined from my most recent stat counter referrals so I don’t have to think too hard.
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